Spoken From the Heart
by PyroChilde
Summary: All things considered, there are very few certainties in this world. What happens when Buffy finds out that Spike is undead and well in LA. Chapter 5 now up! Read and Review!
1. Shocking Secrets

Title: Spoken From the Heart

Author: PyroChilde

Summary: All things considered, there are very few certainties in this world and one of those undeniable facts of life is Andrew's complete inability to keep his mouth shut. What happens when Buffy finds out that our favorite bleach blonde vamp is undead and kickin' once again?

Disclaimer: They aren't mine, you know the drill.

**Spoken From the Heart**

**By: PyroChilde**

Chapter 1: Shocking Secrets

All things considered, there are very few certainties in this world and one of those undeniable facts of life is Andrew's complete inability to keep his mouth shut. As soon as he returned from the great City of Angels, he was blabbing a mile a minute about everything that had happened (and quite a few things that probably didn't). That included mention of a certain bleach blonde vamp that was supposed to be dust scattered beneath the rubble.

Buffy had heard the shocking discovery while her not completely welcome housemate was cooking dinner and going on about his trip for the ten thousandth time. Granted, Andrew hadn't actually broken his promise intentionally. You had to give him credit for holding out as long as he did, if truth be known. He'd been regaling her with tales of his heroism when he let slip that he'd had company going after the insane slayer. Once that had slipped out, Buffy had demanded to know who he'd been running around with. Retrieving Dana had been a pretty delicate situation and the veteran slayer wasn't at all happy to find out that Andrew may have been bringing just anyone in on it. His vague assurances that the guy was alright to talk to did nothing to clam Buffy and it didn't take long to get him to admit the truth. Spike was alive, well undead, and in Los Angeles. Not only was he there and hadn't so much as picked up a phone, but he had specifically told Andrew not to tell her that he had returned.

That afternoon had Buffy storming into the Council Headquarters and sending several secretaries scampering out of the furious blonde's way. A pissed off slayer was not something they had been trained to deal with. A pissed off Buffy was even worse, and most of the women on duty that evening were glad to let their boss deal with his pseudo-daughter on his own. Buffy's blazing emerald gaze landed on Giles and had him out of his seat in under a second.

"Did you know?" She'd demanded, trying so hard to cover the aching in her heart with anger. When her voice cracked over the last word, she the game was up. The tears that welled in her eyes had been like a knife in Giles' chest. The woman that stood before him, usually so strong and independent had looked so lost in that moment. There had been nothing for him to do but move around his desk and take her into his arms. His comforting voice assured her that he'd learned the truth only minutes earlier when Andrew had called to warn him of the blonde whirlwind that would be descending upon his office, and he held her close while she broke down and sobbed. Her gut wrenching cries tore at him as he stroked her back and whispered that everything would be alright.

"He doesn't love me anymore Giles! If-If he did, he would have come back." Her pitiful cries held such loss the older man had barely been able to stand it. That night, Buffy had cried herself to sleep wishing desperately to breathe through the pain. Her vampire would have rather her thought him dead than deal with her.

AN: Make my day, leave me a review!!


	2. A Blast From the Past

Title: Spoken From the Heart

Author: PyroChilde

Summary: All things considered, there are very few certainties in this world and one of those undeniable facts of life is Andrew's complete inability to keep his mouth shut. What happens when Buffy finds out that our favorite bleach blonde vamp is undead and kickin' once again?

Disclaimer: They aren't mine, you know the drill.

**Spoken From the Heart**

**By: PyroChilde**

Chapter 2: A Blast from the Past

It had been a month since Buffy learned of Spike's undead status, and Buffy had begun to move on with her life once again. That, of course, meant that the Powers That Be had to start messing with her head again. She was sitting at the kitchen table looking through a paper that she couldn't even read. It was her day off and she was bored.

Sighing, Buffy went to look for something to occupy her time. Turning on the television and flicking through a couple channels turned up nothing, and so she decided to hop online for a bit, maybe check her email or check out some of her favorite sites. The computer was located in the spare room and Andrew had long ago tried to claim the small space. Logging in, she discovered that he'd left one of his mixes in the computer. He was always making his own mixed CDs and he couldn't seem to remember to put them away when he was done. When the media player opened, Buffy decided to check out what was on this one. She almost fell out of the chair when the first verse of Bette Middler's "Wind Beneath My Wings" filled the air.

Buffy's breath caught in her throat as the words filled the air, and she was taken back to another, much simpler, time in her life. Everything had been so straight forward then. Her mother was around then, and Buffy could still remember the happiness in Joyce's eyes for the brief moment that she had believed her little girl would get married like all the normal girls. That look hadn't lasted long what with her discovering Willow's role in the whole thing, but Buffy had always longed to see that look in her mother's eyes again. Her spell-induced engagement to William the Bloody was one of the happiest times in her life despite the fact that it had all been cause by the magical blunder of her best friend. For a few hours, she'd been loved and in love and she had been truly happy. In the years that came after, Buffy had found herself looking back on that time and wishing that she could find those feelings again.

Tears ran down the slayer's face as she remembered the only real time her and Spike had been happily in one another's arms without the threat of the world falling down around their ears. No one else knew it, but Buffy still had the ring her vampire gave her that night. At the time, it had just been far too embarrassing to return the dreadful thing, but later she had come to cherish that ring. It wasn't really anything special; a skull ring Spike had pulled off his finger in the spur of the moment. After his death, however, it had come to mean the world to her. That and the silver lighter she'd stolen from him one last time before the final battle were the only things she had to remember him by. Hearing the song that she'd wanted played at their wedding only served to remind her of all that could have been and all that she'd lost.

Buffy sat there at the computer and cried for all she had lost. She sobbed her heart out in grief and cursed her own stubbornness that had kept her from seeing the truth for so long. She'd never once made an effort to make Spike feel loved or important while he'd treated her like a goddess to be worshiped and adored. He'd been willing to give his very life if she so desired it but she wouldn't even give him the three simple words he dreamed of hearing. She'd never tried to make things right with him and now he wanted nothing to do with her. It hurt more than words could ever describe.

As the song went on and Buffy continued to dwell on all that Spike had given her, the irony of it all struck her. The lyrics seemed so fitting, now more than ever. A sardonic chuckle escaped her lips and she shook her head, no longer willing to wallow in self pity. If Spike had been willing to go through all that he had for her, on the off chance that someday she might give him just a crumb of what he longed for, then she could damn well make an effort herself! After all, who said that Spike had to call her? She was perfectly capable of making the first contact, and didn't Spike deserve to be the one being chase for once instead of running after her all the time? With her mind made up, the slayer got up and left the computer room. She had a vampire to get in touch with.

TBC...

AN: Review, c'mon you know you wanna!


	3. First Contact

Title: Spoken From the Heart

Author: PyroChilde

Summary: All things considered, there are very few certainties in this world and one of those undeniable facts of life is Andrew's complete inability to keep his mouth shut. What happens when Buffy finds out that our favorite bleach blonde vamp is undead and kickin' once again?

Disclaimer: They aren't mine, you know the drill. Lyrics from Bette Middler – "Wind Beneath My Wings"

AN: A special thanks to BrokenPin, boysxkissings, Ready2Run2007, and AlChEmyOtAkU4EvEr for their kinds words. People that review are awesome. So, enjoy and leave me a review!!

**Spoken From the Heart**

**By: PyroChilde**

Chapter 3: First Contact

It took a while for the slayer to come up with a way to deal with the situation at hand. She would have loved to get on a plane and rush off to Wolfram & Hart expecting to fall into his arms and have him tell her that everything would be alright, but that just wasn't fair to him. She had no right to expect anything from him, and in her heart she knew that. With all that had happened in the last two years, Spike had every reason not to want anything to do with her. For all she knew, he was perfectly happy there in LA doing his own thing. He might even have a girlfriend, but that was not a thought she wanted to entertain. She considered calling him but that just seemed…wrong somehow. In the end, she decided on a writing him a letter. She figured that it would allow him to make up his mind about how he wanted to respond, if he wanted to respond at all, without feeling pressured by her. Sitting down with a pen and paper, she started pouring her heart on the page.

_William,_

_Hello William. There is so much I want to say, and I'm not quite sure how I should begin. I found out that you were back about a month ago Spike, and…why didn't you tell me? I don't know your reasoning, but I understand that this is your decision and I'm going to respect that by staying away. I've been trying so hard to work it out in my head and all that I can come up with is that you don't love me anymore. With the way I've treated you in the past, I can see why that might be true, but God it hurts. I wanted to leave you alone if that's what you wanted…but I can't just move on and leave things like this. There are things that you deserve to know that I never had the chance to say._

_I had a real blast from the past not too long ago Spike. Do you remember Willow's Thy Will Be Done spell? I heard "our song" today. It was like a slap across the face, and I almost turned it off. The memories of that day have tormented me with something that I'll never have at times and then other times they've been something that inspired hope. If I could be that happy because of some stupid spell, I had to be able to find that in real life didn't I? Imagine how disgusted I was with myself when I realized that I'd had it right in front of me and I'd let it slip away. No, that's a lie, I didn't let you slip away Spike, I intentionally threw your love back in your face and stomped on your heart. I think about how I treated you and I hate myself for it. _

_I want you to know, though I know it's probably too late, that I'm not blinded by my own stubbornness anymore. When you were gone that summer before everything went all to hell, I got the chance to take a very close look at myself. I didn't like what I saw Spike. I hated myself, hated who I had become, and I hated you for being more alive and more human than I felt. I look back on our relationship and I can't believe anyone could have taken all my shit and still been able to stand me. The fact that you never stopped loving me through it all astounds me._

_I need you to know that I do see you Spike. I see the man you became, even before the soul, and you are amazing. You deserve to be loved and cherished and treated with respect and kindness. I never gave you that, and yet you gave me so much. I know that now, knew that the entire summer you were gone and all that time while you were there helping me fight the first, but I was so terrified that if I let you in…I would lose you. I'm an idiot, I know, you can say it. I lost you anyways Spike, go figure. You saved the world, and when I finally realized there was no more time to tell you, it was too late. You didn't believe me there in the hellmouth, I never did give you any reason to, but I want you to know that I meant what I said. _

_I love you Spike, and I don't think I could change that if I tried. You have given me strength when I was ready to throw in the towel and surrender. You had faith in me when I didn't even believe in myself anymore. You could make me feel like I was the only woman in the world with just a look. How could you give me so much when I never gave anything in return? I think about you Spike, and I never stopped being amazed at how wonderful you are. Today, when I hear that song, I couldn't help but notice how fitting the words seem today._

_**Ohhhh, oh, oh, oh, ohhh.**_

_**It must have been cold there in my shadow,**_

_**To never have sunlight on your face.**_

_**You were content to let me shine, that's your way.**_

_**You always walked a step behind.**_

_You were always willing to let me take the lead. You never once complained about being second fiddle. It didn't matter if we were going up against a hell god, the armies of hell, or just out on your everyday patrol. You could let me be strong and in control when I needed to, but I always knew that you'd have my back. _

_**So I was the one with all the glory,**_

_**While you were the one with all the strength.**_

_**A beautiful face without a name for so long.**_

_**A beautiful smile to hide the pain.**_

_When everyone around me expected me to be strong for them, to always know what to do and have all the answers, you were there by my side offering your silent (or sometimes very vocal) support. When my friends and family all turned their backs on me, you found me and gave me the strength to go on. I may have gotten the credit for getting the scythe and later killing Caleb, but I would never have had the faith in myself to go after it if not for your support that night. I hurt you so much over the years but you never turned your back on me, not even when I deserved it._

_**Did you ever know that you're my hero,**_

_**And everything that I would like to be?**_

_**I can fly higher than an eagle,**_

_**For you are the wind beneath my wings.**_

_You love with your entire being Spike, without reserve and without conditions. You fight for what you believe in and you don't give a fuck what anyone else thinks about it as long as you believe in it. You would do anything for the people you love. I wish I had that kind of confidence. I wish I knew how to follow my heart like that, to hell with what my brain tells me. I don't think you have any idea how much I look up to you for that._

_**It might have appeared to go unnoticed,**_

_**But I've got it all here in my heart.**_

_**I want you to know I know the truth, of course I know it.**_

_**I would be nothing without you.**_

_I see how much you have changed Spike, and I can't help but be in awe of you. When I really think about it, it boggles my mind. I think about your influence in my life, and I see that there are so many times you held me together when my life and my mind were falling apart. When I came back from Heaven, you're the only thing that kept me grounded in this world. Did you know that? There were times when I actually prayed for death to come and take me back home. That death wish you told me about, I had it in spades. I would come to your crypt and you…you made me forget the pain. You made me feel alive! You could just look at me and make me feel like maybe, just maybe it would be alright again someday. You kept me alive, but more important, you made me actually want to be here._

_**Did you ever know that you're my hero?**_

_**You're everything I wish I could be.**_

_**I could fly higher than an eagle,**_

_**For you are the wind beneath my wings.**_

_Spike, William, you are the reason I am who I am. You have been with me during almost every important moment in my life, and even when you were evil and trying to kill me, you could make me face the truth. You've held me up when I felt like I was drowning and knocked some sense in me when I had to stop pretending. _

_**Did I ever tell you you're my hero?**_

_**You're everything, everything I wish I could be.**_

_**Oh, and I, I could fly higher than an eagle,**_

_**For you are the wind beneath my wings,**_

'_**cause you are the wind beneath my wings.**_

_Did I ever tell you what you meant to me Spike? I don't think I ever did. I wish I could be more like you sometimes. When it comes to fighting the baddies I've got all that super strength going for me, but when it comes to dealing with my emotions I tend to run away scared. You never have that problem. What was it you said, "I may be love's bitch, but at least I'm man enough to admit it!" You've never run from your feelings. You're so much stronger and braver than me when it comes to matters of the heart. I wish I would have let you teach me. I know you would have been there for me. You've been my rock, the person I turn to when things get too hard, even when we didn't particularly like one another. How can that be?_

_**Oh, the wind beneath my wings.**_

_**You, you, you, you are the wind beneath my wings.**_

_**Fly, fly, fly away. You let me fly so high.**_

_**Oh, you, you, you, the wind beneath my wings.**_

_**Oh, you, you, you, the wind beneath my wings.**_

_**Fly, fly, fly high against the sky,**_

_**So high I almost touch the sky.**_

_No matter what I was feeling, you seemed to know how to make it seem better. You could give me the confidence to do anything. You could give me faith in myself even when what I was suggesting was insane. When I'm with you, I feel like I can do anything. How do you do that Spike? How can you make me feel like a goddess when I'm so undeserving of your love?_

_**Thank you, thank you**_

_**Thank God for you, the wind beneath my wings!**_

_You saved my life more times than I can count, and not just by backing me up in a fight. I don't know where I would be now if you'd never come into my life, but I have a feeling that the world just might have ended years ago. Thank you Spike, for all that you are and all that you do. I don't know if I can convince you, but I love you Spike. I love the soft, shy poet that you try so hard to hide. I love the gentle, tender lover that I tried to make you burry. I love beast within that, despite everything I've every been told, can love with an intensity that sometimes scares me. I love all of you Spike, the man, the demon, the soul, everything that you are. I only hope that this time you know that I mean what I say. You are the most amazing man I have ever met, and though words cannot do anything to repair the damage I've inflicted, I'm sorry for how I treated you. You didn't deserve any of it. You deserve to be loved Spike, and I wish you happiness…even if you decide that you can't have that with me._

_Forever Yours,_

_Buffy Anne Summers_

Buffy had stained the paper with her tears as she wrote. She wasn't sure if this letter would make any difference, if he would even read it, but she had been completely honest about her feelings, a rare occasion. As she carefully folded the paper before her, Buffy silently prayed to The Powers That Be that he would give her another chance. She tucked the letter into an envelope and sealed it closed. Not wanting to wait a moment longer than she had to, Buffy arranged to have the message shipped overnight to LA after a quick phone call to Andrew had him divulging her former lover's address. Now, she only had to wait and see if she got a response.

TBC…


	4. Mistakes Realized

Title: Spoken From the Heart

Author: PyroChilde

Summary: All things considered, there are very few certainties in this world and one of those undeniable facts of life is Andrew's complete inability to keep his mouth shut. What happens when Buffy finds out that our favorite bleach blonde vamp is undead and kickin' once again?

Disclaimer: They aren't mine, you know the drill.

**Spoken From the Heart**

**By: PyroChilde**

Chapter 4: Mistakes Realized

Spike was catching up on Passions when the knock at his apartment startled him. There weren't all that many people that knew his new address and he'd seen all of them not an hour before. Frowning in confusion, the vampire paused the tape and got up to see who might be calling. Opening in the door clad in a pair of his low riding black jeans nothing else caused the delivery woman to involuntarily look him up and down, eyes wide and mouth hanging open slightly. Smirk firmly in place, Spike cleared his throat and watched in amusement as the woman gulped before her eyes flew back to his face.

"Can I help you pet?" Spike asked finally. The woman smiled sheepishly and announced that she had a delivery for him and it required his signature. Smiling, the vampire took the offered clipboard and scribbled his name quickly. Looking down at the express envelope, Spike's usually pale face went ghostly white. No longer concerned with teasing the poor girl in front of him, he uttered a distracted "Thanks luv," before closing the door without looking up. His mind was already a million miles away. What lay within the mockingly bright wrapping would change his life forever, of this Spike was certain. The return address was in Rome, and as if he needed further proof of the identity of the sender, in the upper left hand corner her name was scrawled out elegantly; Buffy Summers.

Spike made his way back into the living room quickly. Grabbing the remote, he turned off the television and sat staring down at the too-bright package. Turning it over in his hands this way and that, he contemplated what might lie within. Offhandedly, he wondered why courier companies had the bloody idiotic idea that the shinier the envelope, the more attractive. It seemed ridiculous to him. Shaking his head Spike forced himself to bring the current predicament back to the forefront of his mind. Dozens of thoughts raced through his mind as he considered all the possibilities held within such a small thing. He knew that the boy wouldn't be able to keep his bloody gob shut. Still, he expected the confrontation, when it came, to involve a brassed off slayer showing up in Los Angeles or him crawling back to her begging. After all, he always was the one to go running to her wasn't he? He had no idea what to expect now.

"Just open the bloody thing and find out already you git." He admonished. Not giving himself time to rethink it, the blonde ripped through the gaudy courier's envelope and withdrew another plain white envelope. Again, he didn't give himself time for second thoughts as he ripped through the last barrier. It struck him as oddly amusing, in that hysterical sort of way, that after all he and the slayer had been through he was so terrified to read a simple letter.

Looking at down at the paper, all Spike could think of was how much he missed her. His entire being cried out to go to her, but as of yet he had been too much of a coward to face the powerful woman that had long ago claimed his heart. He longed to see her more and more with each passing day and yet he could not bring himself to go to her for the fear that she would turn him away. The longer he waited, the more terrifying that thought became. Looking down at her words scrawled elegantly across the simple lined paper, he knew that this letter had the power to raise him up to unimaginable heights or bring him crashing down to his knees. Only time could tell which it would be.

Settling himself comfortably on the couch, Spike took a deep unneeded breath and began to read. Almost immediately, his stomach was twisted into knots. By the end of the first paragraph, the guilt was staggering. His poor girl sounded so broken, so unlike that strong, confident slayer he'd known. Tears stung his eyes and it became increasingly difficult to swallow past the lump in his throat. The vampire cursed himself for his cowardice and the suffering it had caused his slayer.

A smile curved his lips as he too recalled the brief happiness the two of them had shared under Willow's spell. At first he had cursed the witch for her reckless actions and the resulting snogfest with the slayer. Later though, that night had become something he dreamed about. Holding her close, seeing her love for him shining in her eyes, those had been some of the happiest times in his bloody existence. It had been a gift and a curse, having those memories drifting through his head.

Shaking off his own memories of that time, Spike read on. There spelled out on the page before him, was tangible proof of all the things he had wanted for so very long. The tears that had threatened earlier were now spilling down over his sculpted cheek bones and he stopped trying to keep them at bay. Sobs were ripped from his throat at the intensity of the emotions rushing through him. He had been waiting so very long to hear her say the three simple but powerful words she had uttered in the hellmouth. When that precious gift had finally been given to him, he hadn't dared to hope it was real. He was dying and the slayer wanted to give him one last good memory to take with him to the grave. That was what he'd thought. Now, reading her declaration, he could hear her voice in his head and it took his breath away. She actually love him, had seen all the changes he had gone through and she even went so far as to suggest that it was her that was unworthy of him!

When they had been "engaged" under Red's spell, Buffy had been insistent that Wind Beneath My Wings be their first dance. Seeing the words to the song made him smile even as her shocking words continued to evoke rivers of salty tears. In all his many years walking this earth, Spike had never had the feeling that he truly mattered to anyone after his mother's death. Even after over a century spent worshipping the ground his black goddess walked upon he knew that she did not love him. He had never been appreciated, never been seen as anything but a thing of convenience. Now, the woman that had captured his heart and lead him to seek out his soul had poured out her heart to him. She spoke of love, pride, appreciation, and respect. With her heartfelt words, Buffy gave him everything that had been denied him for so very long and in the process Spike fell even deeper in love.

TBC...

AN: I'm thinking there will probably be one more chapter and that will wrap things up with this fic. This is my first ever story with more than one chapter, so c'mon and throw me a bone. Leave a review and I'll give you the next chapter J You know you want to know how it ends!! J


	5. Walking on Cloud Nine

Title: Spoken From the Heart

Author: PyroChilde

Summary: All things considered, there are very few certainties in this world and one of those undeniable facts of life is Andrew's complete inability to keep his mouth shut. What happens when Buffy finds out that our favorite bleach blonde vamp is undead and kickin' once again?

Disclaimer: They aren't mine, you know the drill.

**Spoken From the Heart**

**By: PyroChilde**

Chapter 5: Walking on Cloud Nine

He didn't know how long he sat there, staring down at the letter in his hands as salty tears streaked his face. His hands were trembling and he felt as if the world had narrowed down so that all that existed was him and the words on that precious page before him. It may have been hours, days, a lifetime that he sat there or it could have been mere minutes, Spike couldn't be sure. He sat there, unable to move for fear of shattering the euphoria that had settled over him. Finally, after an eternity basking in the new feelings rushing through him, Spike was able to pull himself together enough to move. He stood having decided on what he had to do next. Unable to release his hold on the thing that was beginning to feel like his salvation, Spike carefully folded the paper and stored in carefully in his right front pocket. Taking a deep breath, Spike took the first of many steps that would lead him home.

For as long as Spike could remember, he had been searching for something. In life it had been the love of a woman that would never look at him with anything but disdain. William had dreamed of Cecily Underwood for most of his adult life and he wanted nothing more than to be hers and have her be his. One night had devastated any chance of that and he had been sent fleeing into the night. In a dark alley William had been shown the tiniest amount of affection from someone of the opposite sex and his poet's heart was hers for the taking.

In death it had been the acceptance of a family that would always find him lacking in some way and the love of his sire, a woman that would never truly be his that had him forever searching. Drusilla was to be his deliverance from mediocrity, his dark princess. Instead she had taken what he offered and then run to her Daddy at every opportunity. Spike would have laid the world at her feet if given the chance, but his sire would never be his alone. The rest of his family looked down on him, nothing he could do ever enough to satisfy them. Finally, upon being chipped and falling in love with that slayer, Spike was truly lost. He had been reduced to a lovesick puppy, eagerly begging at her feet for any crumb of emotion.

It had become so ingrained in him over the years that he would never be good enough, smart enough, tough enough, and important enough. He had been told so many times that he was unworthy that it had become something he instinctually believed to be true. Now, after so very long feeling inferior, to be told that he was wanted and needed, after hearing nothing but how unlovable he was that he was loved by the most amazing woman he had ever known, Spike was walking on cloud nine.

The vampire moved towards the bedroom to don his usual all black attire complete with doc martins and leather duster, continued on to the front door. He opened the front door of what now seemed and incredibly sterile, unwelcoming apartment. When he stepped out the front door, keeping to the shadows to avoid the dangerous morning sunlight, Spike walked with his head held high and a confidence in his step that, for the first time in years, was not from male posturing and false bravado. He had the love of a truly incredible woman and a fierce warrior. She had judged him and found him worthy of her love and her respect. Nothing could dampen his mood as he made his way toward his destination.

As the blonde turned the corner into the shaded alley, he was infinitely grateful for his choice in apartment location. The all day sun proof access to Los Angeles' underground network of tunnels had been the overwhelming reason for taking that apartment and the vampire was praising his foresight as he came to the manhole cover. Moving the disc, Spike dropped down into the tunnel below with feline grace. Not bothering to replace the cover, he took off at a dead sprint through the sewers all the while exalting the fact that vampires didn't need to breathe. The short trek was completed in a matter of minutes; the supernaturally enhanced speed doing wonders in cutting down the time it took to arrive at the underground parking lot of Wolfram and Hart. As he ascended into the main garage from the passage below, he cast a look at the Dodge Viper in lot B6. He idly thought that he would miss taking that car joyriding while the magnificent poof got his knickers in a twist. Shaking his head slightly, he proceeded through the parking lot into the offices of Wolfram and Hart.

He sauntered through the door as if he owned the place, and in a place like Wolfram and Hart, that was quite the accomplishment. Though the cocky attitude wasn't anything new coming from Spike, those that saw him that day sensed a change in him. It may have been the way he stood up just a little bit straighter or maybe it was the rare smile on his face unlike the smirks he usually wore. When Fred saw him, however, it was his eyes that did it for her. The ever-present pain that had swirled in his blue irises since he'd materialized in Angel's office was absent and in its place was an almost giddy look that contrasted with his very nature. Fred couldn't help but smile at seeing it.

"Hey Spike!" What brings you by so early?" the bubbly Texan asked. She'd always liked the blonde and she was happily intrigued by the apparent change in him. It seemed the arrogant, sarcastic cynic was gone to be replaced by an almost childish optimism. It made Fred happier just being around him. There was just something about Spike, like a little boy playing at being the Big Bad, that made her want to protect him. She knew it was ridiculous to feel that way about a once vicious killer, especially when that person was a century and a half old vampire. Still, she couldn't help having a soft spot for Spike.

"Oh you know, just need to borrow a jet luv." Spike responded with a grin, bouncing excitedly on the balls of his feet like a little kid. His eyes glittered with mischief and Fred had a feeling that the vampire hadn't exactly planned on _asking_ to borrow the company aircraft.

"Oh really?" she asked, eyebrow arched and a smile curving her lips. Fred giggled like a schoolgirl and rolled her eyes at his antics. Grabbing his elbow lightly, she pulled him into her lab still laughing lightly.

"What's going on Spike?" She asked, feeling a bit like a mother questioning her naughty five year old. She knew that something had to have happened to cause such a sudden change in behavior. The young woman was rewarded with another huge grin. It made him look so much younger and Fred decided that she would love to see this side of him more often.

Spike let out a put upon sigh, but the smile never left his face. The token protest out of the way, he pulled the letter from his pocket. He wanted to get to Rome as soon as possible but he liked Fred and he wasn't about to give her the brush-off. She had been kind to him and had gone out of his way to try and help him. Holding the letter like it was something precious, and it was. Not looking up from the paper in his hands, Spike attempted to explain just how much it meant to him. As the sweet Texan listened, Spike glanced up and watched the emotions drifting through her eyes. By the end of his tale, her eyes were filled with determination and there was that starry eyed look you sometimes see in people after the hero saves the day and gets the girl in so many chic flicks. Fred smiled brightly at him in a way that warmed his heart before she spoke.

"I'm going to help you Spike." She announced, her tone leaving no room for argument. All Spike could do was offer a heartfelt "Thank you pet" and breathe a sigh of relief.

It was so much easier to procure the Wolfram and Hart company jet when the one requesting its use was the head of the science department and a close personal friend of the CEO, though Angel was, of course, left in the dark about the impending departure. Winifred Burkle was a flurry of activity as she made phone calls and gave orders. It only took about fifteen minutes before she sat down beside Spike to place her hand gently on his shoulder to inform him that he would be on a flight to Rome in less than an hour. In fact, the jet would be fueled and ready to go in thirty-five minutes.

When the time came for Spike to leave for the hangar, Spike stopped to thank Fred again for her help. She mumbled some nonsense about cyrumption that Spike didn't understand, but she seemed so excited he didn't have the heart to say anything. Smiling fondly at her, Spike pulled the blubbering woman into his arms for a tight embrace.

"If you ever need anything luv, don't hesitate to call. I can't thank you enough for all you've done." Fred nodded and smiled warmly. When their good-byes were said, Spike left for the hangar. The plane that would take him home to his slayer was waiting for him.

TBC

AN: Alright, so maybe this is going to be a bit longer than I anticipated. I guess we'll see where is goes from here :-D Leave a review if you'd like to know what comes next.


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